Vacations and other deadlines have conspired to make me late this month, kids — apologies for the delay.

In keeping with the theme (and in an effort to finally wrap up our September lists), I’m going to make this quick: my goal was to assemble a list of songs that were just short enough to leave you wanting more, songs that made you skip back & listen to them again right away. Here we go:

1. Ten Minute Turns, “Stars Burn OUT”
   A perfect combination of dusky atmosphere, foot-tapping melody, and a stirring build in voices and instruments to the song’s end.
2. Beastie Boys, “Super Disco Breakin’”
   Hello Nasty got off to a hell of a start with this 2-minute shot of city-street adrenaline. Features one of my favorite Beasties lines ever: “Sometimes I like to brag/Sometimes I’m soft spoken/When I’m in Holland I eat the pannenkoeken.”
3. Willie Nelson, “I Never Cared For You”
   From Willie Nelson’s 1998 collaboration with Daniel Lanois, Teatro. Lanois hypnotically transforms Willie’s devastating country oldie with a spare but atmospheric arrangement, a Latin-informed beat, and lovely & haunting harmony vocals from the unparalleled Emmylou Harris. Worth multiple listens.
4. Blur, “Song 2″
   Before it became a staple of touchdown and goal celebrations in sports arenas, it was the breakout single in the US from Blur’s self-titled 1997 album.
5. Elastica, “Generator”
   I didn’t discover Elastica until after frontwoman Justine Frischmann had broken up with beau Damon Albarn (yep, from Blur) and the band was about ready to implode. The tension in the band’s ranks made for some explosive, intensely catchy punk songs, and this is my favorite of the bunch from their swan song The Menace.
6. The White Stripes, “Hotel Yorba”
   This garage-folk number from White Blood Cells introduced me to and got me hooked on the White Stripes. Don’t think Jack White’s been ever catchier.
7. The Two Man Gentleman Band, “Rabbit Foot Stomp”
   Some practical advice from the 2 Gents. Great, now I’m hungry, too.
8. Florence And The Machine, “Hospital Beds”
   This Cold War Kids cover (I’ve never actually heard the original) was one of the first FATM songs I heard, and I was instantly captivated by Florence’s voice. The song ends just as it reaches fever pitch, too, which left me wanting much, much more.
9. Bill Withers, “Ain’t No Sunshine”
   When evaluating songs for this list, I was shocked at how short this classic is. Never gets old.
10. Eels, “Ant Farm”
    Picking a favorite of Mark Oliver Everett’s short, memorable pop songs was tough, but Lisa Germano’s violin vaulted this heartfelt folk ballad to the top of that long list.
11. Ramones, “I Remember You”
    Punk balladry at its best. I saw U2 cover it in NYC shortly after Joey’s death, too — a magic moment.
12. Blink-182, “What’s My Age Again”
    Early-twenties confusion never sounded so fun.
13. Sam Cooke, “Wonderful World”
    I think this may be my favorite pop song of all time. Really.
14. The Pipettes, “I Love You”
    This song’s Spector-like economy and punch actually defined my personal criteria for this month’s challenge: it ends just as the song feels like it’s come to a boil, and it continues to get loads of repeat listens.

Download: Ten Minute Turns, “Stars Burn OUT” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Beastie Boys, “Super Disco Breakin’” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Willie Nelson, “I Never Cared For You” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Blur, “Song 2″ (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Elastica, “Generator” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: The White Stripes, “Hotel Yorba” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: The Two Man Gentleman Band, “Rabbit Foot Stomp” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Florence And The Machine, “Hospital Beds” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Bill Withers, “Ain’t No Sunshine” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Eels, “Ant Farm” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Ramones, “I Remember You” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Blink-182, “What’s My Age Again” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Sam Cooke, “Wonderful World” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: The Pipettes, “I Love You” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download everything in a handy ZIP file:

Download: “Short Cuts (ZIP)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Let’s keep this brief, shall we?

Since Mandel and Sam decided that the side two medley from Abbey Road was out, I also disqualified using any of the “Fingertips” from They Might Be Giants’ Apollo 18 (such a great album, purposely built to be played in shuffle mode).

So I bring you 18 short songs. Some lack lyrics, but all are complete and lovely in their own right.

1. “Our Prayer” - The Beach Boys
   Such a lovely opening to an album (SMiLE!) that never saw the light of day - at least not as a Beach Boys affair. Dig the interwoven voices of the Wilson brothers, Mike Love and Bruce Johnston as they sing a lovely little prayer.
2. “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad” - John Denver
   Old campfire song standards work, and this song, from Denver’s final studio album before his untimely death, is one that’ll stick with you and take you back…. way back.
3. “Tip-Toe Thru’ The Tulips With Me” -Tiny Tim
   The falsetto of Tiny Tim kept the vaudeville show tune alive for the 1960s generation.
4. “Eruption” - Van Halen
   EVH’s guitar acrobatics here are…. just plain WOW.
5. “A Hard Day’s Night” - Peter Sellers
   Before he recorded The Beatles, George Martin’s oversaw a lot of comedy recordings by groups like The Goons. Peter Sellers was a member of said comedy troupe, and The Beatles were huge fans of Sellers, so the natural crossover was for Sellers to put his touch on this Lennon-McCartney nugget.
6. “Rave On” - Buddy Holly
   Buddy Holly made the most of the time he had on this mortal coil, and “Rave On” is a song that influenced many rock acts to follow.
7. “Not Fade Away” - The Rolling Stones
   This early Stones nugget shows sonic influence from “Rave On,” don’t you think? I do. (And it’s kind of a trick question, as this song is a Buddy Holly song.)
8. “Johnny Saucepan” - Moxy Früvous
   A tongue twister of a song from one of my favorite folk groups.
9. “Mercedes Benz” - Janis Joplin
   One of Janis’ best: a politically charged message delivered with a drunken-yet-immediate fury by one of the best soul singers of the past 50 years.
10. “If You’ve Got The Money I’ve Got The Time” - Willie Nelson
    In just over two minutes, Willie proposes lots of fun things to do on a night out.
11. “Rejected Commercial Jingles: Twister®” - Paul And Storm
    This is what it is….
12. “Shoehorn With Teeth” - They Might Be Giants
    While I exempted the “Fingertips” from this list, I couldn’t omit all the TMBG canon.
13. “Bookends Theme” - Simon & Garfunkel
    “Time it was/and what a time it was….” Such a sad lament. This is the mono mix, which is very, very tough to find.
14. “Prologue” - Kraftwerk
    Kraftwerk’s Tour de France work netted some lovely, short sonic statements.
15. “People Are Strange” - Brave Combo
    I doubt that Morrison and Manzarek envisioned this song as a strident polka. But Brave Combo sure did.
16. “T.V.” - Cheryl Wheeler
    If you need some reasons not to watch, Cheryl Wheeler will provide them.
17. “If Only” - The Kooks
    British power pop can be quick and tidy, too - take that, Oasis!
18. “Song For The Asking” - Simon & Garfunkel
    Yes, it’s a second S&G song, but a perfect closer.

Enjoy these - then go out and listen to Pink Floyd’s “Echoes” or something similarly long.

Download: “Our Prayer” - The Beach Boys (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “I’ve Been Working on the Railroad” - John Denver (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Tip-Toe Thru’ The Tulips With Me” - Tiny Tim (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Eruption” - Van Halen (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “A Hard Day’s Night” - Peter Sellers (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Rave On” - Buddy Holly (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Not Fade Away” - The Rolling Stones (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Johnny Saucepan” - Moxy Früvous (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Mercedes Benz” - Janis Joplin (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “If You’ve Got The Money I’ve Got The Time” - Willie Nelson (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Rejected Commercial Jingles: Twister®” - Paul And Storm (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Shoehorn With Teeth” - They Might Be Giants (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Bookends Theme” - Simon & Garfunkel (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Prologue” - Kraftwerk (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “People Are Strange” - Brave Combo (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “T.V.” - Cheryl Wheeler (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “If Only” - The Kooks (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: “Song For The Asking” - Simon & Garfunkel (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download all the songs in a handy ZIP file:

Download: “‘Brevity In Song” (ZIP)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

This month’s list consists of fourteen songs that clock at about two minutes or less…nuggets of ear-delicious goodness ranging from TV and theme park themes to monologues to mellow album closers. Enjoy!

57.5 BARS by Call Florence Pow
I’d like to nominate this song as the theme song for this month’s playlist theme. I found this song years ago. I don’t remember how I found about these guys, but it’s most self-explantory 1:41 of power pop you’ll ever find. The lyrics are about as straight-forward as you can get and on top of it all, you get a crazy Latin bridge in the middle. Nifty!

CBS’s GREAT MOMENTS theme
The network jingle is an art that’s woefully lost. These songs made you feel that all the shows on network’s lineup and their stars were part of one big happy family. They also helped to ingrain that network’s tagline in your head be it “Still the One!” or “Let’s All Be There!” The 80s were the pinnacle of these mini-masterpieces and ebullient rah-rahs calling you to watch the Big Three. One of my favorites is this 1982 jingle for CBS’s fall lineup. It made you excited that new episodes of The Jeffersons and Magnum P.I. were on the way and then-new hits like Newhart were about to premiere!

NEW HORIZONS theme
In December, I included one of the wonderful songs from EPCOT Center’s original lineup of attractions from 1982. These songs while cheesy exuded an optimism that was quite typical of the 80s Reagan view of the future. This followup in 1983 for the much-missed EPCOT attraction “Horizons” is no different. Sweeping strings, a children’s choir, and hopeful lyrics made you think, “Hey, who cares about the recession and impending nuclear war? The 21st century is gonna be a-ok!

THE GOLDEN GIRLS theme
Upon hearing the first few notes of this song, anybody who grew up in the 80s will think of Saturday nights and America’s favorite horny old grandmas. This is one of the most recognizable theme songs of that era and is one song that pretty much any gay man can sing for you note-for-note. Most people probably don’t know that this song had a previous life as a single for Andrew “Lonely Boy” Gold in the 70s. It’s worth tracking the down the original with its extra verses and rarely-heard bridge. RIP, Bea and Estelle!

CARTIER by Elton John
Clocking in at less than a minute, this is one of Elton John’s shortest songs. He did this one on a whim as a tribute to one of his favorite stores…Cartier. This “commercial” for the world-renowned French jeweler was a B-side for his 1980 single “Sartorial Eloquence.” Look up the a capella version of in Youtube and you can find an a performance of the song that Elton did on Tom Snyder’s old “Tomorrow” show.

LIKE A VIRGIN by Bai Ling
One of my favorite short-lived reality shows was VH1’s “But Can They Sing?” This featured celebrities like Antonio Sabato Jr. and Morgan Fairchild singing in an “American Idol”-style singing competition. On top of all this, it was hosted by Ahmet Zappa. Needless to say, I was hooked from the first bum note. This performance from the premiere episode was from one of my favorite contestants on the show…Bai Ling. She tackles Madonna’s “Like a Virgin.” As with most singing competition shows, it’s a truncated version of the original, but boy…it will stick with you…for a long, long time. Wing has nothing on Bai Ling!

WHAT WOULD BRIAN BOITANO DO? by the cast of South Park
Speaking of Wing, here’s a number from one of my all-time favorite movies: “South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut.” The movie was a near-perfect parody of Disney animated musicals. Here’s the crazy thing…as hilarious as the movie was, the music was REALLY good as it stood on its own and is as good and sometimes better than many of Disney’s music classics. Marc Shaiman (who also composed the music for the wonderful “Hairspray” musical) and Trey Parker wrote this ode to the legendary figure skater who we learn is much more than just an Olympic medalist.

THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL BETTER by Linus of Hollywood
Now, I’m not a beer drinker…I hate the taste of the stuff…but this is one of the most heartfelt love songs to the drink. It’s also probably the best use of beer bottles in a pop song…EVER.

LAMAZE by Harry Nilsson
The prettiest song ever written about giving labor. This nearly-lost song was included as a bonus track in the re-release of Nilsson’s classic “Nilsson Schmilsson.” While many know Nilsson for his stirring covers of “Without You” and “Everybody’s Talkin’”, a lot of people didn’t realize he had quite the sense of humor. I propose we send this song to natural birth coaches everywhere!

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? by William Shatner
On the other side of the spectrum is this monologue by William Shatner. When I first bought his Ben Folds-produced album “Has Been,” I was expecting a goofy novelty album but what I instead found were some interesting musical pieces with very insightful lyrics read by the former T.J. Hooker. This one is probably one of the most personal pieces on the album recounting his reaction when he found his wife Nerine dead at the bottom of their pool. Very eerie and chilling…

YOUR MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION by Ben Folds Five
This piece was from Ben Folds Five’s final album “The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold Messner.” The album found them getting into prog-rock territory and expanding beyond the raucous piano-bass-drums feel of their debut. This track doesn’t feature any vocals from Ben Folds but instead centers around a rambling answer machine message that Ben’s dad left. To this day, I still have no idea what the hell it’s about…

JUNK by Paul McCartney
A wistful song from Paul McCartney’s first solo album. Beautiful in its simplicity and doesn’t overstay its welcome…an often overlooked gem in the Macca canon.

THE WHOLE WORLD AND YOU by Tally Hall
The newest song on this list…Tally Hall was featured prominently in my best of ‘08 list and this shows the band’s diversity as they throw a bit of Dixieland jazz into the mix. Keyboardist Andrew Horowitz takes over the lead vocals in this song which was recently featured in an ad campaign for Crayola. A good pick-me-up of a tune that reminds all of us that “there’s no one better than you!”

SOUVENIR by Billy Joel
Gonna close this out with a song that Billy Joel used to use as his final encore song for years…This was the final track on his sophomore Columbia release, “Streetlife Serenader.” While the album is one of his most uneven, this short coda to the collection of songs is one its highlights. His live performances of this song would be almost always be capped off by his very helpful reminder to his audiences: “Don’t take any shit from anybody!” I concur, Billy…unless it’s from me with my oddball song selections for my Selective Service playlists!

Download: Call Florence Pow, “5.75 Bars” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: CBS’s Great Moments theme (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: New Horizons theme (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: The Golden Girls theme (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Elton John, “Cartier” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Bai Ling, “Like A Virgin” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: The Cast of South Park, “What Would Brian Boitano Do?” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Linus of Hollywood, “Thank You For Making Me Feel Better” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Harry Nilsson, “Lamaze” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: William Shatner, “What Have You Done?” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Ben Folds Five, “Your Most Valuable Possession” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Paul McCartney, “Junk” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Tally Hall, “The Whole World And You” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

Download: Billy Joel, “Souvenir” (mp3)
(Right-click/control-click link to download)

ZIP file of all songs will be posted tomorrow!

For those who demand quantity over quality, here you go - a selection of songs all less than a minute long! In the interests of maintaining listenability I’ve excluded hundreds of intros / skits / interludes etc, choosing instead to focus on pieces that, while short, still establish their own identity as songs. So here we go, strap yourself in and feel the Gs: thirty-four songs in twenty-five minutes, twenty seconds!

1. The Dodos, “Eyelids” (mp3)
2. Black Flag, “Wasted” (mp3)
3. De La Soul, “A Little Bit Of Soap” (mp3)
4. Mellow, “Codename Dragonfly” (mp3)
5. Why?, “Twenty-Eight” (mp3)
6. The Flaming Lips, “The Spontaneous Combustion Of John” (mp3)
7. Monty Python, “I Bet You They Won’t Play This Song On The Radio” (mp3)
8. The Bulgarian Voices, “Stoyan Ide Ot Grad Zarigrad” (mp3)
9. The Undertones, “Casbah Rock” (mp3)
10. The Stone Roses, “Elizabeth My Dear” (mp3)
11. The Polyphonic Spree, “The Crash” (mp3)
12. Porn Theatre Ushers, “Nabo Himself” (mp3)
13. Sublime, “Drunk Drivin’” (mp3)
14. Fight Like Apes, “Megameanie” (mp3)
15. The Beatles, “Moonlight Bay” (mp3)
16. The Art Of Noise, “Nothing Was Going To Stop Them Then, Anyway” (mp3)
17. Consolidated, “There Is A Mountain Filled With Blood” (mp3)
18. The White Stripes, “Passive Manipulation” (mp3)
19. Minor Threat, “Small Man, Big Mouth” (mp3)
20. Princess Superstar, “Blue Beretta” (mp3)
21. The Red Elvises, “Follow The Yellow Brick Road” (mp3)
22. Ween, “Old Man Thunder” (mp3)
23. Neutral Milk Hotel, “Seven” (mp3)
24. Richard Cheese, “99 Luftballoons” (mp3)
25. Jenny Owen Youngs, “First Person” (mp3)
26. Stiff Little Fingers, “Here We Are Nowhere” (mp3)
27. Men Without Hats, “Bright Side Of The Sun” (mp3)
28. Michael Andrews, “Cellar Door” (mp3)
29. Run-DMC, “Son Of Byford” (mp3)
30. Primus, “Sathington Willoby” (mp3)
31. Deerhoof, “The Eyebright Bugler” (mp3)
32. Pink Floyd, “New Machine, Pt. 2″ (mp3)
33. The Books, “PS” (mp3)
34. Raymond Scott, “In The Hall Of The Mountain Queen” (mp3)

ZIP file of all songs will be posted tomorrow!

This month, Selective Service has done a bit of downsizing. To help those of you with ADD, we’ve each put together a list of short songs — songs that are less than 2 1/2 minutes long (songs from The Beatles’ “Abbey Road” side two suite could NOT be used).

Uncle Sam asked me to do the writeup of this and at first I was offended thinking it was a knock on my smaller stature, but I got over that and thought, “who better to write up about this list than me?”

I mean, one of my favorite kinds of foods are mini-foods. White Castles, Mini-pizzas, KFC snackers… these songs are like the equivalent of those. They’re hors d’oeuvres of music… melodic sliders… tapas tunes… mini-morsels that are packed with big taste!

So, get your mouse and aural appetite ready, but there are a lot of songs to download this month…behold this month’s lists that prove that great things can come in small packages!

• The Man(del) from UNCLE’s “Bite-Sized Bliss”
• UNKLE Matt’s “The Snippettes”
• Onkel Rudi’s “Brevity in Song”
• Uncle Sam’s “Short Cuts”